“Etiquette does not render you defenseless. If it did, even I wouldn’t subscribe to it. But rudeness in retaliation for rudeness just doubles the amount of rudeness in the world.” Judith Martin.
Man is a social animal and to truly excel in life, he has to deal with all kinds of people, day in and day out. This daily course of interpersonal interaction necessitates us to come across people who can be exceptionally rude to us at times. In order to deal with rude people, you must understand the cause of rudeness and the reason of you being a victim of it. Whenever you find yourself in a situation where you find unwarranted rudeness directed at you, follow these simple steps to better deal with the rude person:
* Try to grasp the context
More often than not, people behave rudely due to situations or circumstances. People behave rudely to strangers or in situations where they don’t feel obligated to behave properly. Some people don’t even realize that they are behaving rudely and lack social or interpersonal skills. It is, therefore, imperative that before reacting to rudeness, you should try to understand the underlying emotions and motivations behind somebody’s rudeness. If you can assess the true cause of rudeness, you will be able to take a better and rational action towards addressing rudeness.
* Analyze the behavior pattern of the rude person
At times, people behave rudely towards others due to prejudice – racial, regional or gender bias. Some people also behave rudely under duress or when going through emotional turmoil. Therefore, the best you can do to give the other person a fair chance is to observe such behavioral pattern in a rude person in order to determine your actions further.
* Keep a calm exterior
Once you have identified the cause and context of rudeness, you must always remind yourself that inner poise and exterior calm can only help you handle rudeness well. Most situations in which rudeness is retaliated with rudeness escalate to social awkwardness and unease.
* Confront and address
Having emphasized the importance of keeping calm, it is also important to confront and address the act of rudeness. If you feel that the other person has behaved rudely with you without provocation or reason and it upsets you, then you must make it a point to confront the offender and express your dislike of their rudeness. Timely confrontation can help you avoid future rudeness and also address underlying conflicts.
* Don’t retain any grudge or negativity
Once you have confronted and buried the hatchet of rudeness between you and the other person, try not to hold any form of negativity or grudge. If, inadvertently, you share your disgruntlement over rudeness with a mutual friend and facts become distorted into rumours and gossip, then any chance of you salvaging your relationship with that person would go down the drain. Therefore, try to forget the rude incident and be discreet about your opinions.
* Avoid repeat rudeness
If, despite confrontation, calmness and discretion on your part, a person continues to behave rudely with you then it is better to avoid the repeat offender in public situations. Remember, some people would rather hold on to their prejudices than accept reality. Thus you should be the mature person here and choose your company more wisely.